Why me?

Cancer can happen to anyone at any age. Yes, it will be difficult to accept it in the beginning, but denying the fact and blaming fate will only worsen the emotional distress. Cancer is like any other normal disease and if you positively accept it and move forward, the question of why me will not occur. Like you can’t choose as to which family you’re born into, but you still accept the family god has given you, you should accept it that way.

How long will I live?

Difficult to predict for any one. You may die for a reason other than cancer, so do not ask this question. Believe in God who has given everyone their share of destiny.

From where I will arrange funds?

The first thing to do is to analyze your savings, insurances and other investments. Please do also have a look at the government policies and schemes available for cancer treatment and if there is any availability from them, work these figures around your treatment costs and have the total estimate checked from doctors and counselors.

How to tell my employers or customers?

The employers need to be updated upfront. You need their support. Arrange for a service back up and take your customers into confidence. They need to be assured of continuity of service.

What should I ask my doctor?

Ask the following questions:

1. (What kind/mode of treatment will take place?)

2. (How long will the treatment last?)

3. What can be the side effects of treatment and how do I cope with them and how much will it impact me)?

4. How much will the treatment cost?

5. Should I take another opinion? (Is it advisable to take multiple opinions?)

If I succumb to cancer, what can be a sustainability plan for my dependents?

There are some things you can plan. Write them down, plan and share with your family. For other things, make out a long term plan to make them self sustainable for example, the priority should be on how the children can be given academic and professional training to make them self sustainable in a short period rather than how to buy a house for them.

How to tell my family, specially children?

All family members should be taken in confidence. Everyone has a different approach to absorb the truth and react to it. Don’t be afraid of reactions…face it.

How will they react and how will I handle them?

Consult your doctor. Understand all required facts about the disease, status of the patient’s health, course of treatment etc. Patient should be apprised based on his physical and mental condition.

How to take decision on disposal of assets for meeting cost of treatment?

If the need arises, prioritize the sale based on the utility of assets and their market value. Jewellery is a dead investment and should be disposed first.

How to break news with my fiance?

The news should be shared upfront without being afraid that he/she can break the relationship. The relationship ought to be based on long term commitment.

Will I be able to recover and live a normal life?

Definitely. Believing that you will be able to recover is the first step towards recovery. Try to remain very positive during the treatment and if you feel constantly low and down, seek the help of a counselor or a therapist. Also, reading survivor stories, positive quotes, poems and poetry will keep your morals up along the way.

Will I survive?

“Don’t give up till you actually lose…” is the key to survival. Yes, you have a chance to survive till you are alive. Even a 10% chance of survival is a big possibility…

How long will I live?

Living and dying are not in our control, the only thing that we have control over is to make the best of whatever time we’ve got and live it in the most meaningful manner.

Am I at the right place? / Is this the best treatment? / Is the doctor not overcharging?

Please check the credentials of your doctor/ hospital before jumping into the treatment. This does not take much time. You should have complete confidence on your doctor once the treatment starts.

Family members – How to face the situation and handle the patient?

The patient needs to be kept motivated and occupied at all times. Times are bound to be difficult but with each other’s love and support, it will be easier and manageable.

My spouse/ fiancé has abandoned me, what should I do?

This is a difficult situation. Abandonment at a stage like this can be very destructive and it is advisable to take help from professional care givers and counselors.

How will they react and how will I handle them?

Consult your doctor. Understand all required facts about the disease, status of the patient’s health, course of treatment etc. Patient should be apprised based on his physical and mental condition.

How do I handle all the sympathy around me?

Doctors and medical staff help a lot in these situations. Family members should not panic and try and keep cool and positive.

I have been fired from my job…no income..only expenses…what should I do?/I am running out of money…from where to arrange funds?/With no income, how long will I survive?

A tough situation to be in. Explore taking loan from friends and relatives. Evaluate selling assets and explore if any financial assistance is available from any sector.

Should I go for an alternate treatment instead of chemo?

The decision must be taken after taking your treating doctor into confidence.

How to face the situation and handle the patient?

Keep your cool, don’t panic, remain positive.

Did I do the right thing by choosing this doctor?

If you feel, don’t be afraid of taking a second opinion.

Should I discontinue treatment and switch to alternate medicines?

Don’t rush. Things may actually deteriorate. Take your doctor into confidence.

Were my relatives right on suggesting some other doctor?

Don’t go on soft advise. Take a second professional opinion.

I have spent so much money, how much more will be required for the treatment?

Check with your doctor.

How will my spouse take care of my children after my death?

Difficult situation to handle but everyone has to face the truth. Bring them along and share the fact.

How to deal with spouse, children and other family members?

Do not panic. Be strong. If required, take professional counseling.

How to deal with the situation and handle the patient going forward?

Take help of your doctor and professional counselors, if the need be.

How do we tell patient about the disease?

Take help from doctor and If required, from professional counselors.

How to tackle patient’s emotions?

Remain positive, don’t panic, keep patient occupied, empathize..don’t sympathize. If needed, take professional help.

Should we go for alternate treatments?

Check credentials and consult your treating doctor.

Our doctor has advised chemo/ radiation/ surgery. Should we go for it or take a second opinion?

Second opinion is your right. If you feel so, you must take a second opinion.

Where should we take a second opinion?

Look for a hospital or doctor with credentials atleast equivalent to your treating.


The organization successfully places the cancer survivors in the society through medical guidance, information, and financial independence. The mission of Win Over Cancer is threefold: survive, support, and save.